If I were to attend an addictions meeting I would introduce myself like this, "Hi I'm Jill and I'm a perfectionist."
I strive to always make things bigger, better, more exciting the next time around. I am a believer in excellence. I want to make God look good, after all, right?!
I might not mind if I made myself look good in the process too. (cough, cough. Pride)
Did we have the highest ever turn out at VBS last year? We will double that this year.
Did we send more kids to camp this summer than ever before? This year we'll send more and raise more funds to send more kids free of charge.
Did my kid just make a decision that made me proud? Then I start hammering home the next value I want her to model.
Does my home look clean? Well, now we work to make it spotless!
Work longer.
Push harder.
Do more.
Perfectionism in ministry and motherhood has never proven to be positive. Instead, it oftentimes.....
Leaves me exhausted
Disoriented--I have so many things going through my mind at once that I can't think clearly or make decisions.
Sometimes makes others afraid to work with me because of the impossible standards I set.
Each time I strive to be perfect, I fall short.
God didn't call me to be perfect. Far from it. If I were, I wouldn't need Him. I don't need to have all of the answers. I am allowed to mess up.
God doesn't need me to be a perfect parent/pastor. He needs for those around me to see HIS perfect work in me. My perfectionism is yet another way that God continues to chip away at my exterior and allow Himself to be seen doing what He does best...total transformation.
Maybe you feel the pressure to be perfect too. Maybe you constantly try to outdo what you've recently accomplished. Maybe you're in need of a transformation as well. Take the steps and begin your road to recovery!
How about you? Do you ever struggle with being a perfect parent/pastor? What have you done to overcome this?